NETWORKING - EMBRACING THE NEWCOMER

 Have you ever attended an event-personal or business-for the first time and it seemed as if everyone glanced briefly toward you and then turned away?  How about when you walked up to a group-particularly of a business nature-and the group closed together with their backs facing as if to thwart your advance?  Or, you are at a wedding-all friends and family of the bride and groom RIGHT ???-their closest and most loved people in the whole world-and you receive a look of intrusion accompanied by a rather curt response.  Then, that back turning thing occurs.  I have.

In 2012, when I started my WOW group-Women Optimizing Women-in Carroll County, Maryland, this was an ongoing topic of discussion.  The majority of women shared similar experiences.  Two of the primary reasons I began this 'exclusive-to-women' group was to encourage rapport and build relationships.  I realized someone had to take this issue to task.  I wanted to educate the women of the importance of embracing other women into the group.  Making an introduction can be difficult by all parties.  Someone needs to initiate it and the women of WOW agreed it was their responsibility.  

There are reasons we behave the way we do.  Some people are insecure even though they have attended meetings with similar attendees for a period of time they still possess a level of awkwardness in meeting others.  They find a comfort level with maybe 5 or 10 people.  They span the venue for those familiar faces and feel a sense of relief when they find them.  Change.  It is not easy.  Others are worried they will forget peoples names or conversations they may have had previously OR what business they are associated with.  Yes-most of us are guilty of these social inadequacies.  You may have different reasons.  It's okay.  We are all there to meet and network.  

In the example of a networking group, walk up to 3 individuals you do not know and introduce yourself.  I like 3's.  So, I will do my best to meet 3 new people.  When someone attends whom you have never seen before, take the initiative to do the same.  Spend a few minutes chatting, exchange your business card, and speak their name several times during the conversation while maintaining eye contact.  Shake hands-this is ever so important.  When I look into someone's eyes and shake their hand, I am connected.  Sometimes, I have been known to keep the physical contact for a longer period of time than others.  For those not feeling confident with too much physical contact, extending an elbow for a mutual connection can provide a safe haven as well as a level of humor to a new relationship. A flip of the open palm and a 'prince or princess wave' may be more acceptable.  A hug goes a long way but, may be reserved for special connections.  

The level of satisfaction from your accomplishment will follow you out the door at departure from the venue and will provide the open gate to attend the next function.