MY WORD!

 Have you ever noticed how a word can linger in your thoughts?  A part of a sentence which just cannot escape your mind?  A word can cause damage or it can create considerable enlightenment.  It can also fill one with such love and joy.  I listen to daily pod casts most week days to grasp onto a word, a goal, a mindset, or an idea to relate to and work towards.  There are times when a word goes deeper, longer such as when you make a commitment; like marriage.  A vow.  The vow.  A slew of words of endearment, praise, love, and devotion to your betrothed.  

I had chosen the word VISION for this year.  That encompasses primarily my business career and writing and of course, I have a vision for the health and happiness for my family.  But, there is another word I find extremely important when it comes to business and personal.  That word is commitment.  When you give a vow to your mate, when you realize you are going to spend time with that one special person for the foreseeable future, you speak of your COMMITMENT.  Without a commitment, without agreeing to the importance of commitment, the relationships and strength of the parties is relatively weak.  

I had entered into a relationship.  I knew full and well I had to have the absolute commitment from the other party to engage with one another in the relationship with dignity and respect.  No arguing; no fighting; no angry fists or abusive language or behavior.  Without a lingering thought, the other party agreed.  He understood where I was coming from.  He knew of my past abusive relationship.  He agreed to honor my request.  With time,  episodes of angry tones erupted from him.  Quips with a crisp tongue for absolutely no reason.  The anger appeared from time-to-time.  It did not go away. It became a daily norm.  It wasn't something we were able to discuss as I got shot down with a menacing look or a loud bang as an object was thrown around me.  I felt like I could not say anything...and, I truly mean this...without him being angry.

The anger continued.  An emphasis on a single word.  The word would penetrate my thoughts and I was determined to remove it from my mind.  I refuse to let a person reduce me to a level I never wanted to be a part of.  I grew up in a family of bad words.  Hateful and angry.  I grew apart from them and had my life of my own.  I created that.  I took the core elements of the family of good and built on those.  I want better for myself.  I continue to hold firm on my belief of commitment.  I know the words.  The right word.  Mend your fences.  Renew your commitment.  Even if you cannot speak the word to the other party.  Change the word of anger to one of happiness.