IT TAKES TWO-ME AND YOU

 Sonny and Cher were a trendy young couple in the the early 1970's.  They had a comedy hour and the title of this blog was the theme of one of their songs.  Well, it took two to make their relationship and it took the two of them to end it.  The responsibility of the relationship relies on both parties; it is not one sided.  Each participant is to take the blame for a fight or unsettled quarrel or celebrate the successes.  When we are under the social microscope or under pressure the intensity of a situation may be magnified.  Certain circumstances may drive an elevated response such as pressure from the family to get married or a birth/death/change of employment/new home.  

These are all life experiences and most of us will understand the relevance of the need to be prepared; especially, if a situation was not handled as well as we would have liked in hindsight.  How can you prepare for a birth or a death?  My fingers actually stopped hitting the keyboard on this one.  The honest answer; you cannot.  No more than you can prepare for a lengthy hospital stay or an unforeseen accident.  Rightly so. BUT, you can take responsibility for those situations you have control in.

Working together when an incident/quarrel or other event in relationships is key.  I re-met my current husband and he is a true gentleman.  Most of the times.  He knows I mean this.  He has a short-fuse (he's come a long way-trust me!) and doing a project can be a challenge.  After we first started living together, we would cook dinner together, have a few drinks, play music, and dance in the kitchen.  It was a lot of fun!  BUT, as time passed and the reality of living together and sharing the domestic interior and exterior projects became somewhat habitual we ran into some issues.  We could not work together.  He became angry because I didn't put something on the 'right' shelf and I stormed off leaving him to finish the task.  It was unpleasant and I fumed over this for days.  I doubt he did.  He was happy to work alone.

Eventually, and this took time, we could paint in a room together for hours on end or dig up the back yard to prepare for an amazing garden.  He is more of the laborer than I and I am the planner and organizer.  I designed our great room-a 520 square foot addition and he did the drawing to present to the county.  I over-saw and ran the day to day construction and expenses and he helped the contractors and finished the work they never came back to complete.  It took both of us-together-with our different set of skill sets to complete the projects.  

We learned.  We took time to not just argue but, to talk about the issues and there were times we 'agreed to disagree'.  I bet that is something you seldom hear about or even say these days.  It's either someone is right or someone is wrong.  No.  There are different ways of thinking.  There are different ways of doing.  There is mostly the same thoughts for success.  The core of each of us is quite similar to one another.  We thrive when we work together-you and me.